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What You Need To Know About Last Night’s Oscars Debacle

Many viewers were left wondering about the sequence of events that led to the initial erroneous declaration of ‘La La Land’ as the Best Picture winner at the Academy Awards Sunday instead of the real winner, ‘Moonlight’. The Onion breaks down what you need to know about this fiasco.
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Andy Rooney Stepping Down

Longtime 60 Minutes commentator Andy Rooney made his final appearance on the show Sunday. Here are some quotes from his storied career:

"The other day, I finally gave in to my wife's prodding and tried a peanut for the first time" (Sept. 16, 1984, "Peanuts Are All Right")

"Like many Americans, I have a book of matches" (Jan. 6, 1985, "When The Lights Go Out")

"Everyone's talking about Baby Jessica and how she's okay, and we're all glad for that. But no one's talking about that well. Can they still use it? Will they have to build a new one? That's what I'd like to know" (Oct. 18, 1987, "What About The Well?")

"If I could, I would lick everything in sight" (Nov. 24, 1996, "The Problem With Self-Adhesive Stamps")

"Bill Clinton is a ninny. Tony Blair is a ninny. Steve Case is a ninny. Lawrence Eagleburger is a ninny. Dom DeLuise is a ninny. Lee Iacocca is a ninny" (Jan. 18, 1998, "Everything Is Wrong Nowadays")

"M&Ms have many colors but only one taste. That's why they flew planes into those buildings" (Sept. 11, 2001, "It's Our Own Fault")

"I'm just not doing my commentary tonight and I don't think I need to give you a reason" (June 16, 2002, "Not Tonight")

"I'm the only person I know who still gets three newspapers every morning" (Oct. 13, 2002, "I Don't Know How To Cancel A Newspaper Subscription")

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