April 9, 1942

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Vol 42 Issue 15

New Healthier Pigs

Scientists have cloned pigs that are engineered to contain omega-3 fatty acids, which produce healthier pork. What do you think?

Gospel Of Judas Found

A 1,700-year-old papyrus document called the Gospel of Judas indicates that the apostle Judas betrayed Jesus to the Romans at his request. What do...
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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Healthy Living

  • The Onion’s Guide To Gym Etiquette

    Every new year brings a surge in gym membership from new members nicknamed “resolutionists,” many of whom may be unaware that there are unspoken rules everyone must observe when working out.

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