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Rural Working-Class Archbishops Come Out In Droves To Welcome Trump To Vatican

VATICAN CITY—Arriving in their dusty pickup trucks from as far away as the dioceses of Oria and Locri-Gerace to express their support for a leader who they say embodies their interests and defends their way of life, droves of rural working-class archbishops reportedly poured into St. Peter’s Square today to greet U.S. president Donald Trump during his visit to the Vatican.

Trump: ‘I Am A Very Stupid Human Being’

WASHINGTON—Responding to a damning ‘Washington Post’ report alleging he had shared highly classified information with Russian officials, President Donald Trump addressed the concerns of the press, his fellow government officials, and the public at large Tuesday by announcing that he was an incredibly stupid human being.

Escalating Tensions Lead Trump To Shake Up Inner Circle Of TV Programs

WASHINGTON—Saying the decision arose out of the necessity to weed out certain key members whose values no longer aligned with the president’s, White House spokesman Sean Spicer told reporters Thursday that escalating tensions have led President Trump to shake up his inner circle of television programs.
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Best Debate Moments

The Republican presidential candidates have participated in 13 debates since last May, with each event seeming to have a different frontrunner. As the Iowa Caucus leads us into the primary season, here are some highlights from the verbal jousts:

  • Aug. 11: Tim Pawlenty throws his back out after 90 minutes of leaning from his podium to try to get his face on TV
  • Sept. 7: Mitt Romney objects to Jon Huntsman repeatedly referring to himself as the "good Mormon"
  • Sept. 12: Rick Perry accidentally winks at a sound guy
  • Sept. 22: A fumbling, mortified Mitt Romney finds himself at a loss when debate moderator Bret Baier asks the candidates one-by-one to pull out and describe their concealed firearms to the audience
  • Nov. 12: An aide to Rick Perry is positioned near the fire alarm should the governor again not be prepared to answer a question
  • Dec. 10: Mitt Romney comes off as out-of-touch with the common man after challenging Rick Perry to a bet of $10,000, a velvet satchel of loose gemstones, and a wastebasket made out of an albino elephant's foot
  • Dec. 15: Feeling secure with his increasing lead in the polls, Newt Gingrich attends the debate wearing only his boxers
  • Dec. 15: In spite of another strong debate performance, Ron Paul plunges in the polls as voters grow bored and tired of the congressman having constantly stuck by his principles and policy positions throughout the entire campaign

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Trump: ‘I Am A Very Stupid Human Being’

WASHINGTON—Responding to a damning ‘Washington Post’ report alleging he had shared highly classified information with Russian officials, President Donald Trump addressed the concerns of the press, his fellow government officials, and the public at large Tuesday by announcing that he was an incredibly stupid human being.

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