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Sports

Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

NFL Loses Rights To ‘Super Bowl’

NEW YORK—After failing to agree to terms for a new licensing agreement before the February 3 deadline, the NFL lost the rights to the term “Super Bowl” on Friday, sources confirmed.
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Best MLB Stadiums

With opening day rapidly approaching, Onion Sports provides a helpful guide to the greatest ballparks in Major League Baseball.

  • PNC Park: With its picturesque skyline views and fan-friendly amenities, PNC Park would be a great place to watch any team other than the Pirates
  • Wrigley Field: The second-oldest major league baseball stadium has 41,000 seats that can fit roughly 18,000 Chicago Cubs fans
  • AT&T Park: Offers a thrilling activity in the bay just outside the stadium where kayakers fight to the death to please throngs of bloodthirsty onlookers
  • The Coliseum: Home of the Oakland A’s, it boasts all four bases, a pitcher’s mound, and an outfield
  • Minute Maid Park: While the retractable roof is impressive, the real gems of this park are the 1,086 black flags hanging from the rafters that commemorate every Astros loss since the park opened in 2000
  • Tropicana Field: Has over 40,000 great empty seats for every Rays game
  • Coors Field: Home runs abound in Denver where the air is thin and the outfield fence is 150 feet from home
  • Marlins Park: The beloved establishment recently installed a gigantic statue in center field of Marlins owner Jeffrey Loria flipping off all the fans while defecating on a miniature version of Miami
  • U.S. Cellular Field: Named in honor of beloved White Sox manager Upwood Sidney Cellular
  • Citizens Bank Park: Philadelphia’s downtown stadium offers fantastic sight lines, delicious local grub, and comfortable seats from which to scream racial epithets
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