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Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

NFL Loses Rights To ‘Super Bowl’

NEW YORK—After failing to agree to terms for a new licensing agreement before the February 3 deadline, the NFL lost the rights to the term “Super Bowl” on Friday, sources confirmed.

Keys To The Matchup: Packers vs. Falcons

The NFC Championship Game pits the Atlanta Falcons against the Green Bay Packers for the rare chance to play a meaningful game in Houston. Onion Sports breaks down what each team must do to win.
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Biggest All-Time NCAA Tournament Upsets

Either Butler or VCU will be in the NCAA Tournament's final game this year, raising the possibility of a historic upset and calling to mind these previous David-over-Goliath moments:

  • 1966: Texas Western shocks the nation by becoming the first team with an all-black starting five to win the national championship, a result that, in retrospect, isn't really all that surprising
  • 1983: NC State wins the title, an impressive feat considering players have to dodge coach Jim Valvano, who spends the entire game running on the court trying to hug someone
  • 1985: In the tournament's final game, little Villanova knocks out the powerhouse Hoyas by invoking the new "Patrick Ewing Will Never Again Win a Championship at Any Level" rule
  • 1986: Cleveland State's "run and stun" style, combining fast breaks and pressure defense, is more than a match for Indiana's style, which is getting yelled at constantly by its asshole coach
  • 1992: Defeating the heavily favored Wolverines for the championship, Duke ruins everything by proving that team discipline outlasts swagger and bravado
  • 2001: No. 2 seed Iowa State loses to some guy named Hampton
  • 2005: Vermont defeats Syracuse 60-57 in the first round when Orange great Derrick Coleman turns out to be a nonfactor in the game, having gone to the NBA 15 years previously
  • 2006: George Mason beats Wichita State, Michigan State, UConn, and UNC, an outcome some treat as so miraculous that the Patriots may as well be a festering sack of wet shit instead of a pretty good basketball team
  • 2011: Though most would say everyone should take a step back before classifying Morehead State's win over Louisville as one of the all-time great upsets ever, we have space to fill
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Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

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