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Sports

Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

NFL Loses Rights To ‘Super Bowl’

NEW YORK—After failing to agree to terms for a new licensing agreement before the February 3 deadline, the NFL lost the rights to the term “Super Bowl” on Friday, sources confirmed.

Keys To The Matchup: Packers vs. Falcons

The NFC Championship Game pits the Atlanta Falcons against the Green Bay Packers for the rare chance to play a meaningful game in Houston. Onion Sports breaks down what each team must do to win.
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Biggest Upsets Of The Sochi Olympics

In major upsets, both snowboarder Shaun White and downhill skier Bode Miller came up short of the platform in their signature events at the Winter Olympic games. Here are some of the shocking surprises so far in Sochi:

  • In a momentous upset within the Halberstrom household, youngest daughter Libby sides with Dad and Brett, resulting in a 3-2 vote to watch Undercover Boss instead of figure skating
  • 15-year-old figure skating phenom Julia Lipnitskaia of Russia overtakes U.S. favorite Ashley Wagner as the one your grandma likes
  • Canada plays the U.S. in women’s hockey, upsetting a set of gender norms that help keep our society stable
  • All those guys somehow fit into that bobsled
  • The U.S. hockey team defeats the U.S.S.R. in Lake Placid, which for Dad still feels like it was yesterday
  • All-black Carter High School Olympic figure skating team manage to defeat rivals from St. Dominic’s Prep after inspiring speech from coach
  • Against all odds, Russian folk hero Ivan Tsarevich captures the Fire Bird’s feather, befriends the Gray Wolf, and lives happily ever after with Helen, his beloved
  • The irrepressible biathlon article “Belarus’ Domracheva Wins Olympic Gold” manages to exit the 24-hour news cycle in a mere 15 minutes, setting a new Olympic record
  • Someone not from the U.S. wins an event
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Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

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