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Report: Look How Big Player Is Next To Sideline Reporter

GREEN BAY, WI—Marveling at the pronounced disparity in size during the postgame interview, sources confirmed Sunday that, Jesus Christ, just look at how big Houston Texans nose tackle Vince Wilfork is next to the CBS sideline reporter.

Best Sports Video Games Of All Time

With titles such as ‘FIFA 17’ and ’NBA 2K17’ expected to be popular gifts this holiday season, Onion Sports looks back on some of the best sports video games of all time.

Strongside/Weakside: Ezekiel Elliott

After becoming only the third player in NFL history to rush for 1,000 yards in his first nine games, Dallas Cowboys rookie running back Ezekiel Elliott is an early candidate for league MVP. Is he any good?

Strongside/Weakside: Theo Epstein

In just five seasons, Chicago Cubs president of baseball operations Theo Epstein assembled a team that is competing for the franchise’s first World Series title since 1908. Is he any good?

Jumbotron Really Trying To Push New Third-Down Cheer On Fans

SAN DIEGO—Noting that the phrase had appeared in large blue letters during each of the team’s offensive drives, sources at Qualcomm Stadium confirmed Friday that the Jumbotron was trying really hard to push a new third-down cheer on San Diego Chargers fans.

Strongside/Weakside: Kris Bryant

By leading the Chicago Cubs in hits and home runs en route to their second straight playoff appearance, Kris Bryant has placed himself in the running for the National League MVP. Is he any good?

Rest Of Nation To Penn State: ‘Something Is Very Wrong With All Of You’

WASHINGTON—Stating they felt deeply unnerved by the community’s unwavering and impassioned defense of a football program and administration that enabled child sexual abuse over the course of several decades, the rest of the country informed Penn State University Friday that there is clearly something very wrong with all of them.

Strongside/Weakside: Lamar Jackson

After passing for eight touchdowns and rushing for another 10 in just the first three weeks of the season, Louisville Cardinals sophomore quarterback Lamar Jackson has quickly become the frontrunner to win the Heisman Trophy. Is he any good?
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Championship Teams At The White House

The championship winner's White House visit is a hallowed tradition, but some have gone more smoothly than others. Here are some of the most memorable:

1902: Theodore Roosevelt honors self after felling particularly large elk

1943: After a perfunctory greeting, Franklin D. Roosevelt orders the world champion Yankees to get back to the front immediately

1974: Hard-nosed running back Larry Csonka of the NFL champion Miami Dolphins presents a ceremonial game ball to Gerald Ford, breaking the president's arm in four places

1978: Officials struggle to maintain order, several high-ranking Generals are flabbergasted, and President Carter dodges a bucketful of confetti during the Harlem Globetrotters' annual White House visit

1987: Ronald Reagan regales the Mets with more cocaine stories than they can handle

1992: Duke forward Grant Hill feels like a complete idiot for bringing a big bowl of fruit salad to the ceremony

1999: After being told President Clinton is "very busy," the WNBA champion Houston Comets are greeted by Secretary of Transportation Rodney Slater

2004: Although the Marlins are the reigning World Series champs, George W. Bush invites the Texas Rangers for a visit instead

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