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What To Watch For In The New Obi-Wan Kenobi Film

Disney has announced they are in the early stages of developing a stand-alone ‘Star Wars’ film focused on the adventures of Jedi master Obi-Wan Kenobi. Here’s what fans can expect to see in the upcoming release.

Man In Center Of Political Spectrum Under Impression He Less Obnoxious

MT. VERNON, OH—Loudly explaining to anyone within earshot that both the left and right were ruining the level of discourse in this country, Jesse Levin, a man firmly in the center of the political spectrum, is under the impression that he is less obnoxious than those with more partisan viewpoints, sources reported Friday.
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Chinese National Found Guilty Of Stealing Trade Secrets

A former Motorola software engineer was found guilty of stealing industrial secrets, though acquitted of charges she intended to commit espionage on behalf of China. Here are some of the secrets she may have been trying to smuggle out of the country:

  • The plots to the next three Droid commercials
  • Motorola is poised to shift all its efforts back to CB radios should the market for them ever return
  • Schematics for an alarm that chooses when it works
  • Experimental prototype of tri-fold flip phone
  • Code for turning :) into little cartoon
  • Closely guarded, highly advanced tablet and smartphone tech specs that Motorola originally stole from Apple and Samsung
  • Text thread where Tyler totally admits he cheated on Brandy
  • How to make the most cutting-edge, desirable mobile phone of 2004

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