CIA's Authorized Torture Practices

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Vol 43 Issue 41

Atlantic City Mayor Resigns

After an absence of nearly two weeks in which his whereabouts were largely unknown, Robert W. Levy, mayor of Atlantic City, NJ, returned to office...

Piping-Hot Calzone Missing

WEST ORANGE, NJ—"It was right here a second ago," said the owner of the sizzling Italian sandwich, which was last seen in the office break room at approximately 1 p.m.

Police Tasers Deemed Safe

A recent independent study determined that Tasers are generally safe in the hands of the police. What do you think?
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CIA's Authorized Torture Practices

The New York Times uncovered memoranda of secret Justice Department legal opinions regarding methods of interrogating enemy combatants. What interrogation practices were deemed allowable?

Middle seat in coach on flight between Jacksonville, FL and Las Vegas, with stopover in Chicago

Setting prisoner atop dunk tank, asking one question, tossing baseball

Repeating everything suspect says in mocking, nasally voice

Using the Flegamajunka Technique, which is pretty much anything the interrogator needs it to be

Conducting the interrogation while eating a really big, delicious piece of cheesecake

Water/sand/sawdust/
cobra/concrete/glue/vodka-boarding

Anything featured on the previous night's episode of 24

Asking politely

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