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Politics

Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.

Trump’s Budget Proposal: What You Need To Know

President Trump has revealed his first budget blueprint, which contains $54 billion in cuts while accommodating increased spending on defense and security. The Onion details the major elements of Trump’s proposed budget:
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Clinton's Schedule Released

In order to assist her presidential bid, the William J. Clinton Presidential Library has made public 11,000 pages of Hillary Clinton's calendar while she was in the White House. Here are some of the notable excerpts:

Feb. 16, 1993, 10:15 a.m.—Pick Cambridge, VT as village that will raise Chelsea during her father's term.

March 11, 1993, 8:59 a.m.—Take deep breath; 9:00 a.m.—Introduce new, shorter haircut to American people.

April 27, 1994, 3:00 p.m.—Finish The New York Times crossword puzzle during Nixon's funeral.

Dec. 20, 1995, 7 p.m.—Attempt to decorate White House Christmas tree, then put down box of ornaments, say "This is bullshit," and walk out.

Jan. 25, 1996, 4:15 p.m.—Document Shred-a-Thon '96.

Aug. 21, 1999, 4:38 a.m.—After screening The Sixth Sense, order Secret Service to check on every noise you hear during the night.

Sept. 18, 1999, 5:00 p.m.—Sigh wistfully, pine for Arkansas, a place you never really got to know...not really.

Jan. 19, 2001, 5:00 p.m.— Buy New York Yankees hat. Run over it with car three or four times to give it worn look.

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