College Too Expensive?

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HELENA, MT—Continuing his lengthy trek around the league, sources confirmed Friday that 36-year-old journeyman fan Brian Ferretti has joined the Arizona Cardinals, his sixth team in the past five years.

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WASHINGTON—Noting that the level of mental strain associated with the profession was far and away the highest recorded, a federal study on workplace conditions and occupational stress released Thursday has confirmed that your job is the most demanding career in the entire nation, and that none of your friends or family fully understand how hard it is.

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College Too Expensive?

The National Center for Public Policy and Higher Education issued a report last week warning that college costs are in danger of outstripping family income. What are some cost-cutting measures universities can take to ensure they're more affordable?

Not be so uptight about keeping campuses clean or safe

Charging only for amount learned

Proposed tax cut for students who can graduate in one semester

Replace RAs with 20-minute looped video on the dangers of STDs

Suggest students just bring along their old textbooks from high school

One communal shower per campus, totally unrelated DVD sales

Turn junior year abroad into a daylong bus ride down the interstate.

Lower tuition