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Company Paying For Bad Drugs

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Brita Unveils New In-Throat Water Filters

OAKLAND, CA—Representatives from Brita, the nation’s bestselling brand of household water filtration products, held a press event Wednesday to unveil a new line of filters designed to be installed directly inside users’ throats.

Video Game Henchmen Plan Meetup Around Explosive Barrels

LEVEL 5—A group of video game henchmen patrolling the warehouse hideout of their criminal mastermind boss informed reporters Wednesday of their upcoming plan to take a brief break from making their rounds to meet up around a stack of five highly explosive barrels.

Study Links Clinical Depression To Getting Dunked On

BOSTON—Identifying a significant factor contributing to the development of the mental health disorder, researchers from Harvard Medical School published a groundbreaking study Thursday that reportedly links clinical depression to getting dunked on.

How Dating Sites Match Their Users

With millions of people opting to use online dating sites to meet new potential romantic partners, many are wondering how computer algorithms can enhance their chances of finding “the one.” Here are the steps that dating sites take to match compatible users

How To File A Patent

In the United States, anyone who believes they have invented something truly unique is welcome to fill out a patent application to protect it, but it’s often a complicated and laborious process. Here are the steps involved in securing a patent

EPA Urges Nation To Develop New Air Source

WASHINGTON—Citing the hazardous levels of carbon dioxide and other pollutants accumulating in the atmosphere, officials from the Environmental Protection Agency urged the nation this week to develop a new air source.
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Company Paying For Bad Drugs

Last week, British drug manufacturer GlaxoSmithKline agreed to pay $750 million to settle civil and criminal complaints alleging that for years the company knowingly sold bad, contaminated, and ineffective drugs. Here are some issues with the products it sold:

  • Paxil: Was found to be flawed when a number of patients reported they were still aware of their problems
  • Tagamet: Studies have shown this acid-reflux drug has potentially dangerous side effects when combined with aspirin, Tylenol, or water
  • Daraprim: Cheap orange gelcap knockoff left Cheetos-type stains if held in hand for more than three seconds
  • Imitrex: Tips of old screws clearly sticking out of most pills
  • Coreg: Long marketed as a heart-health treatment, this product actually proved to exist only in pen, notepad, and stress-ball form
  • Dexedrine: While this simple medication of pure amphetamine continues to effectively treat ADHD and narcolepsy, it also caused 47 percent of patients in clinical trials to stay awake for five straight days listening to Lou Reed's Berlin over and over
  • Avodart: Researchers admitted that they just dumped a bunch of leftover chemicals in a beaker and sold it as-is
  • Professor Bailiwick's All-Purpose Cranial Liniment: This topically applied medicine failed to live up to claims of preventing typhus, consumption, Injun magic, and deficiency of manly character

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