adBlockCheck

Entertainment

Grievances Brought Up With Powerless Supervisor

GRAND RAPIDS, MI—Fed up with an increasing workload and problems with his coworkers at CLG Software, project coordinator William Garsten reportedly took a list of grievances Wednesday to supervisor Todd Watkins, a middle manager utterly powerless to...

The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

Your Horoscopes — Week Of January 31, 2017

Aries: They say there’s nothing quite like the bond between a mother and her child, but then they have yet to see your experimental new adhesive compound. Taurus: The stars, in their infinite wisdom, recommend that you check yourself this week, as not doing so might lead you to wreck yourself in the future.

Your Horoscopes — Week Of January 24, 2017

Aquarius No offense, but when got into this business, dealing with empty and meaningless futures like yours sure as hell wasn’t what it had in mind. Pisces Though you’ve been told that dressing up once in a while wouldn’t kill you, the coroner’s report this week will contain evidence to the contrary.
End Of Section
  • More News

Dr. Seuss' Lesser-Known Titles

The late Theodor Seuss Geisel, known to generations of fans as children’s author and illustrator Dr. Seuss, would have celebrated his 109th birthday on Saturday. Here are some of his lesser-known works:

  • The Cat In The Iron Lung: A six-foot-tall cat encased in an artificial breathing contraption pays a visit to a pair of deathly terrified children
  • One Fish, Two Fish, Three Fish, Four Fish, Five Fish, Six Fish, Seven Fish, Eight Fish: An unsuccessful early effort released before Seuss learned to use his imagination
  • The Jumping Jampaloo: Seuss’s most controversial book featuring gratuitous use of the word “jampaloo,” which in the Seuss lexicon is comparable to “motherfucker”
  • Do As You’re Told: The story of a boy who immediately eats the green eggs and ham placed in front of him without getting lippy
  • And To Think That I Saw It On Bourbon Street: Marco pays $2 to watch Sneetches do it
  • Ibiza Nights: A memoir
  • Pigs In Wigs: A beloved piglet is able to put on his own hairpiece despite his struggles with stage III bone cancer
  • Reservoir Dogs: Several dogs botch a diamond heist in this gritty crime thriller for children aged 4 to 8, which later served as the basis for the 1992 film of the same name
More Videos

WATCH VIDEO FROM THE ONION

More from this section

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

Your Horoscopes — Week Of January 31, 2017

Aries: They say there’s nothing quite like the bond between a mother and her child, but then they have yet to see your experimental new adhesive compound. Taurus: The stars, in their infinite wisdom, recommend that you check yourself this week, as not doing so might lead you to wreck yourself in the future.

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close
settings