Pros And Cons Of The Gig Economy

Americans are increasingly using on-demand services, both as workers and consumers. Here are the major benefits and drawbacks of the gig economy.

Frontier Airlines Tells Customers To Just Fucking Deal With It

‘You’re Uncomfortable For A Few Hours And Then You Get To Be Somewhere Else,’ Says CEO

DENVER—Noting that some discomfort should be expected while traveling to a faraway place in just a few goddamn hours, officials from ultra-low-cost carrier Frontier Airlines reportedly told customers Thursday to just fucking deal with it.

Helpful Man Saves Woman Effort Of Telling Idea To Boss Herself

ATLANTA—In an unprompted act of generosity from one coworker to another, Spryte Logistics employee Ben Graham reportedly took the initiative to share one of Emily Fehrman’s ideas with their boss on Friday, saving her the time and effort of doing it herself.

Fisher-Price Releases New In Utero Fetal Activity Gym

EAST AURORA, NY—Touting it as the perfect tool for entertaining and stimulating the fetus during gestation, Fisher-Price announced the release Wednesday of a new in utero activity gym. “Whether they’re batting at the friendly toucans in order to harden their cartilage into bone or tapping the multicolored light-up palm tree to test out their sense of vision once their eyes open at 28 weeks, the Fisher-Price Rainforest Friends Prenatal Activity Gym is guaranteed to give your fetus a head start and keep it happy and occupied,” said director of marketing Kevin Goldbaum.

It Kind Of Sweet CEO Thinks He Doing Good Job

SEATTLE—Admitting that the sight of him laying out his vision for the company was pretty endearing, employees at Rainier Solutions reported Monday that it was kind of sweet that CEO Greg Warner thinks he is doing a good job.
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eBay CEO Resigns

After 10 years, Meg Whitman will be stepping down as CEO of the online auction house eBay. Here are some highlights of her tenure at the top:

1998-present—Universally redefined what constitutes rare, mint, and sealed

April 30, 1999—Sold just an all-out avalanche of handbags in 20 minutes

February 8, 2000—Dictated that used panties no longer be sold unless it's for charity

June 8, 2001—Expanded colored star–icon range from five to 83

October 2002—Dropped partnership with PayAcquaintance in order to purchase the more convivial PayPal

September 17, 2002—Started a brief trial of eBay Black for the sale of drugs, weapons, and human organs

September 27, 2004—Bought herself copy of Baby-Sitters Club 4: Mary Anne Saves The Day

January 25, 2008—Relinquishes job for $100 million cash and an eggbeater shaped like Kermit

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