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Man Holding Hands With Pregnant Woman Must Have Weird Fetish

RED BANK, NJ—Testing the limits of what even the most progressive onlookers considered publicly acceptable, a man was seen by multiple witnesses Tuesday holding hands with a visibly pregnant woman in what many could only interpret as the expression of a bizarre fetish.
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Emerging Technologies

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2009 saw a number of eye-popping new gadgets and devices available on the consumer market. Here are some of the ones that really delivered:

Remote-Controlled Chocolate Fountain—Fresh dipping chocolate now ready and flowing whenever you're ready to get up off the couch.
Google G1—Users searching for specific contact information will be delighted by this hip new smartphone's "I'm Feeling Lucky" feature, which dials a random publicly listed phone number.
Wii Fit—Provides workouts for your fat avatar.
Amazon U2 Edition Kindle—Housed in a sleek black-and-red casing, this electronic reading device comes preloaded with U2's favorite books.
Canon PowerShot E1—This remarkable new device essentially freezes a moment in time, displays that singular moment visually on a small screen, and enables one to re-access that moment at any time one wishes, either using that device or a larger device with a looking-window attached.
The Apple Mini—This new miniature version of the major corporation Apple can be stored in a corporate headquarters the size of a matchbox.
Panasonic Toughbook—A laptop so thick and tough that it will scare the living shit out of you.
Hasbro A.M.P. Robot—Proves once and for all that listening to music is a lot better with a dancing robot than without a dancing robot.

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