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The Onion’s Fall TV Preview

Networks are just weeks away from debuting their Fall lineups, featuring both new shows and returning favorites. The Onion breaks down what to watch this Fall.

Most Anticipated Panels At Comic-Con

San Diego Comic-Con kicks off tomorrow, and this year’s schedule is packed with must-see events. Here are the most highly-anticipated panels of Comic-Con 2017.
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Explore Your Year: Timeline 2008

An exhaustive recap of every important event:

Jan 22: Hollywood mourns the loss of a sequel

Feb 24: Kid brother receives hand-me-down Cuban dictatorship

March 15: Jeff's birthday

April 15: Delta, Northwest Airlines merger forms the world's longest check-in line

May 30: An adorable robot searches for love in the summer blockbuster 'Sex And The City'

June 27: Robert Mugabe re-elected with massive grassroots violence campaign

July 12: 97lb Amy Winehouse is followed everywhere by sound of low, tolling bell

August 7th: Cheney is outraged over invasion of smaller country by Superpower

Sept 20: Louis Vuitton Bag attached to end of stick

Sept. 24: Mother Nature enters menopause

Oct 4: Bunch of rich jerks fuck everyone right in the ass

Oct 15: GOP spends $15 on Todd Palin's goatee

Oct 22: Thousands of astronauts cling to the side of India's first spacecraft launch

Nov 4: Lincoln memorial seems more relaxed following Obama victory

Nov 8: Russia decommissions 20 Navy officers 30,000 feet below sea level

Nov. 27th: World's Muslims complain Eid al-Adha decorations going up earlier every year

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