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Politics

Robert Mueller Driving SUV 100 MPH Down Runway As Air Force One Narrowly Lifts Off

PRINCE GEORGE’S COUNTY, MD—Sending a pair of guards scrambling for safety as he gunned his black SUV through a chain-link gate and onto the tarmac, Robert Mueller, the former FBI director who was recently tapped to lead the ongoing investigation into the Trump campaign’s ties to Russia, chased Air Force One down the runway at Joint Base Andrews moments before takeoff, sources reported Tuesday.

Trump Asks Entire Senate To Clear Out Of Chamber So He Can Speak To Comey Alone

WASHINGTON—Entering through a side door and bidding the assembled legislators, congressional aides, and members of the media to give him a moment with the former FBI director, President Donald Trump reportedly asked the entire Senate to clear the chamber during James Comey’s testimony Thursday so he could speak to him alone.

A Timeline Of The Watergate Scandal

With the White House mired in controversy, comparisons to Washington’s most famous scandal have been common, if not always accurate. Forty-five years after the events leading to Nixon’s resignation, The Onion presents a detailed timeline of the Watergate scandal.
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Fact-Checking The Debates

The four presidential and vice presidential debates of the 2012 election season featured countless questionable or conflicting claims, giving the nation’s fact-checkers more than their fair share of work. Here are some of their key findings from the debates:

  • Contrary to Obama’s claims, PBS does account for 90 percent of federal spending
  • All four candidates incorrectly stated they were “happy to be here” during the debates
  • Jim Lehrer misspoke when he described himself as the moderator of the first debate
  • Mitt Romney erroneously claimed there were “less jobs” today than four years ago, when, in actuality, it’s “fewer jobs.” “Less” applies to an amount that can’t be counted directly, such as the volume of a liquid
  • All of the candidates cited their deep religious beliefs despite there being no God
  • Paul Ryan inaccurately claimed he was running for vice president. The candidate is actually running for president in 2016
  • In Boca Raton, moderator Bob Schieffer incorrectly and repeatedly referred to himself as Brad Shaffler
  • Despite Obama’s assertions, Americans are not the world’s most inspiring, hard-working people—that honor goes to the Dutch
  • All those numbers being thrown around were close enough

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