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FCC Eyeing Cable Regulation

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Hollywood Stars Overthrown In Bloody C-List Uprising

LOS ANGELES—Unleashing a brutal wave of violence and destruction that has upended the entire power structure of the entertainment industry overnight, the nation’s C-list celebrities have carried out a bloody coup to overthrow the hottest stars in Hollywood, sources reported Tuesday.

Lost Jack London Manuscript, ‘The Doggy,’ Found

RYE, NY—Workers inventorying the estate of a recently deceased Westchester County art dealer earlier this month reportedly stumbled upon a draft of a previously unknown Jack London novel titled The Doggy, and the work is already being hailed by many within the literary world as a masterpiece.
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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  • Email From Mom Sent At 5:32 A.M.

    DENVER—After waking up and finding the message waiting on his computer, local man Drew Swanson confirmed to reporters Thursday that his mother had sent him an email at 5:32 a.m.

FCC Eyeing Cable Regulation

The Federal Communications Commission will vote on placing a number of restrictions and regulations on the unregulated cable industry. Here are some of the proposed changes.

All shows claiming to be "the next Sopranos" must submit a proposed series ending before airing pilot

No more than three crawls on screen at the same time

Product placement only allowed if characters would really, really enjoy the brand

Shopping networks can no longer allow customers to buy merchandise shirtless

Add "HBO: Tom Hanks" to list of available HBO channels

The Hallmark Channel and Spike TV must be bundled in the same package to cancel each other out

Weather Channel limited to five F-words per hour

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