adBlockCheck

Recent News

Earth Ranked Number One Party Planet

FRAMINGHAM, MA—Noting its high concentration of nightlife, droves of attractive singles, and atmospheric conditions allowing liquid alcohol to exist, the ‘Princeton Review’ on Monday ranked Earth the Milky Way galaxy’s top party planet for the fifth year in a row.

Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.
End Of Section
  • More News

Features Of George W. Bush Presidential Library

The technologically advanced and highly interactive George W. Bush Presidential Library and Museum will open to the public on May 1 in Dallas. Here are some of the notable features of the museum:

  • Interactive world map that lets visitors create their own Axis of Evil
  • Visitors can ride the fun Approval Rating Slide all the way from Bush’s first year in office down to the last
  • Exhibition of the best Bush effigies from all around the world
  • Entire wing devoted to quick, effective federal response to Tropical Storm Arlene
  • Tastefully done oil-on-canvas painting of a nude Laura Bush
  • Free “Museum Accomplished” button handed out to all visitors after making their way through just the first of 25 rooms of the museum
  • A replica of Saddam’s nuclear warheads
  • Building’s total area is 800 square feet
More Videos

WATCH VIDEO FROM THE ONION

More from this section

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close