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Dwight Howard Clearly Doesn’t Know Team’s Name

WASHINGTON—Noting his confused expression and uncertainty while shouting incorrect nicknames throughout the playoff game, sources confirmed Wednesday night that Atlanta Hawks center Dwight Howard clearly does not know his own team’s name.

Man Tries Using Pink 6-Pound Bowling Ball To Great Amusement

WEST ORANGE, NJ—Seemingly knowing full well that the relatively small and light ball was not designed for someone of his size, sources confirmed Tuesday that 25-year-old Darren Foerstner tried using a pink 6-pound bowling ball for one frame, all to the incredible amusement of friends and onlookers at Eagle Rock Lanes bowling alley.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.
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Gaffes By NFL Replacement Referees

The NFL's replacement referees are off to an inauspicious start, bumbling numerous calls while officiating the first preseason games. Onion Sports takes a look at the worst blunders.

  • Failed to penalize team for unsportsmanlike behavior after player exhibited slightest bit of emotion after touchdown
  • Awarded a bronze medal to Algeria
  • Forgot to collect scorecards from the players as they left the field
  • Took the Hall of Fame Game seriously like a bunch of goddamn maniacs
  • Showed up on field in Eli Manning replica jerseys
  • Neglecting to call any holding penalties, which, regardless of whether there’s holding, are always a real crowd pleaser
  • Ruling everything outside the hash marks out of bounds
  • Replacement referee Rick Jansen made a terrible call, according to sad, decrepit humans watching preseason football in a bar
  • Crossing a picket line, screwing over colleagues, destroying any chance of every getting into pro referee union

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