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Dwight Howard Clearly Doesn’t Know Team’s Name

WASHINGTON—Noting his confused expression and uncertainty while shouting incorrect nicknames throughout the playoff game, sources confirmed Wednesday night that Atlanta Hawks center Dwight Howard clearly does not know his own team’s name.

Man Tries Using Pink 6-Pound Bowling Ball To Great Amusement

WEST ORANGE, NJ—Seemingly knowing full well that the relatively small and light ball was not designed for someone of his size, sources confirmed Tuesday that 25-year-old Darren Foerstner tried using a pink 6-pound bowling ball for one frame, all to the incredible amusement of friends and onlookers at Eagle Rock Lanes bowling alley.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.
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Golf's More Obscure Rules

When Dustin Johnson grounded his club at Whistling Straits, he unknowingly took a two-stroke penalty and brought some of golf's unusual regulations into the spotlight.

  • If a player tees off from more than one club length behind the tee area, the player receives a one-stroke penalty and has to forfeit his car to the state
  • A three-shot penalty will be issued to anyone caught enjoying themselves
  • A ball at rest should not be disturbed, as it is sleeping
  • Players must finally give up search for ball after 72 hours
  • If a player is caught beating his wife or kids with his golf clubs, he takes a two-stroke penalty
  • Partners may share clubs, but not during the same swing
  • Your little sister gets to pick the red ball if you got to play with the red ball last time
  • Putter may be used like a pool cue to crack up other golfers only once per round; after that the joke gets old and the player should come up with something else
  • Players will be disqualified for using full-sized pencil on scorecard

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