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MLB Unveils Memorial For Runners Stranded On Base

NEW YORK—Solemnly ringing a bell 30 times for each of the teams that lost potential runs this season, Major League Baseball officials unveiled Tuesday a memorial outside league headquarters to commemorate all of the runners who have ever been stranded on base.

Dale Earnhardt Jr. Submits Paperwork For Gas Reimbursement

LONG POND, PA—Hunching over the steering wheel of his idling No. 88 Chevrolet SS to closely inspect the odometer, NASCAR driver Dale Earnhardt Jr. was reportedly in the process of submitting paperwork Monday to reimburse his gas expenses for the month.

A-Rod Donates $25 Million To Be Displayed In Glass Case In Baseball Hall Of Fame

COOPERSTOWN, NY—Ensuring that a treasured piece of the game’s history will be forever preserved for future generations of fans, representatives of the National Baseball Hall of Fame confirmed Friday that retired third baseman Alex Rodriguez recently donated $25 million of his earnings to be displayed inside a glass case in their museum.
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Great Home Run Derby Moments

The Home Run Derby has become almost as compelling as the All-Star game itself. We look back on how this came to be so.

  • 1985: MLB Commissioner Peter Ueberroth bets a drinking buddy he can get idiot fans to pay to see eight guys take batting practice for a couple hours
  • 1991: Cal Ripken, Jr. slugs a then-record 12 home runs in one round to capture the…wait. Oh, God, Cal couldn't have done steroids, too, could he have?
  • 1996: Fan Richard McCarthy catches every home run hit into stands
  • 1999: Mark McGwire hits a ball through the Green Monster
  • 2003: Albert Pujols does a 360 while jumping over a car, hits the pitch through his legs, and then swish: nothing but bleachers
  • 2005: Bobby Abreu breaks the record with 41 utterances of the word “home run” during his post-Derby interview
  • 2007: Unable to pace himself, Alex Rios wastes all of his home runs in one swing, blasting a 8,653-foot bomb

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