adBlockCheck

Sports

Dwight Howard Clearly Doesn’t Know Team’s Name

WASHINGTON—Noting his confused expression and uncertainty while shouting incorrect nicknames throughout the playoff game, sources confirmed Wednesday night that Atlanta Hawks center Dwight Howard clearly does not know his own team’s name.

Man Tries Using Pink 6-Pound Bowling Ball To Great Amusement

WEST ORANGE, NJ—Seemingly knowing full well that the relatively small and light ball was not designed for someone of his size, sources confirmed Tuesday that 25-year-old Darren Foerstner tried using a pink 6-pound bowling ball for one frame, all to the incredible amusement of friends and onlookers at Eagle Rock Lanes bowling alley.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.
End Of Section
  • More News

Greatest Barrier Breakers In Sports

With Missouri defensive end Michael Sam becoming the first openly gay NFL prospect this week, Onion Sports examines athletes who have broken down the biggest barriers in sports.

  • Jackie Robinson: Became the first Dodger second baseman to win the MVP award in 1949
  • Kate Barber: In 1987, she became the NBA’s first female cheerleader
  • Alex Rodriguez: The first and only MLB player to take steroids
  • Jason Collins: Showed that a gay man could appear in the news cycle for a few days before never being heard from again
  • Flying Ebony: By winning the 1925 Kentucky Derby, at last prevailed against the rampant discrimination that has historically faced black horses
  • Mike Trout: With his upcoming announcement on February 17, the Los Angeles Angels star will become a major trailblazer for gay players in not only Major League Baseball, but all American sports leagues
  • Pete Carroll: Bravely defied narrow-minded regulations saying a coach can’t offer gifts to recruiting prospects
  • Danica Patrick: TBD
  • James Naismith: In 1891, became the first lifeform on earth to play basketball since the forgotten Tô-Uktül civilization in 26 million B.C.
  • Renee Richards: Made huge strides in transsexual rights after winning the right to play tennis as a woman, ultimately inspiring thousands of other men to have sexual reassignment surgery in order to gain an unfair advantage just as critics had predicted
  • Metta World Peace: Broke down barrier separating players from fans in order to punch fan

More from this section

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close