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‘Star Wars’ Turns 40

When George Lucas’ Star Wars premiered in 1977, the movie quickly became a phenomenon. On its 40th anniversary, The Onion looks back on the franchise’s defining moments:

Ringo Starr Announces 26th Beatles Album With New Backing Band

‘Moonbeam Sunday’ Slated For Release On June 16

LONDON—Excitedly informing fans that the iconic pop group was back with more original music, Ringo Starr announced Tuesday that on June 16 he would be releasing a 26th Beatles album titled ‘Moonbeam Sunday’ with an all-new backing band.
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Green Day's 'American Idiot' Musical Opens

A stage adaptation of Green Day's 2004 album American Idiot opened on Broadway last week. Here are some of the plot highlights from this boy-pursuing-his-dreams-in-the-big-city story:

  • A towering crescendo, rotating stage platform, and flashing klieg lights simulate the simultaneous pain and elation of having one's nose pierced
  • Love interest reveals she's a Bush supporter moments too late, when the couple has just finished making love and singing about it
  • The chorus refuses to stay on stage just because that's what they were told to do, so they totally mosh in the aisles as punk-colored balloons fall
  • Early hit "Hitchin' A Ride" is performed with plenty of vocal razzle-dazzle as originally intended
  • Main character calls everything he likes "Tré Cool!"
  • The Angel of Punk Rock turns out to be a disfigured roadie who lives in an underground lair beneath the old CBGB
  • Chorus dancers wearing leotards with the letters D, U, and H never manage to line up properly
  • The protagonist ultimately realizes that fulfillment doesn't come from rigid societal conformism, but from a mild, inoffensive brand of nonconformism that is easily digestible—even widely marketable—to the masses

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