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Handicapping The 2008 Belmont Stakes

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Rest Of Nation To Penn State: ‘Something Is Very Wrong With All Of You’

WASHINGTON—Stating they felt deeply unnerved by the community’s unwavering and impassioned defense of a football program and administration that enabled child sexual abuse over the course of several decades, the rest of the country informed Penn State University Friday that there is clearly something very wrong with all of them.

Strongside/Weakside: Lamar Jackson

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Former WWE Wrestler Found Alive At 44

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Strongside/Weakside: Dak Prescott

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Study: 96% Of Pickup Games Decided By Next Score

PRINCETON, NJ—Noting that none of the game’s earlier events factored into the final outcome in any way whatsoever, a study released Wednesday by researchers at Princeton University revealed that 96 percent of all pickup games are decided by the next score.

Kevin Durant Wins Gold In Men’s Individual Basketball

RIO DE JANEIRO—Beating out Serbian Nikola Jokic by .87 points in order to claim the all-around title, U.S. forward Kevin Durant won Olympic gold Friday in men’s individual basketball, becoming the first man to win consecutive golds in the competition since Gary Payton at the 1996 and 2000 Games.
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Handicapping The 2008 Belmont Stakes

The last race of the 2008 Triple Crown brings the prospect of the first Triple Crown winner in 30 years. Onion Sports rates at all the top horses:

Big Brown, 2/7: Look for Big Brown to win the Triple Crown and unite a divided nation behind his tenacity, athleticism, and grace; or do none of that by losing

Casino Drive, 9/2: Longtime horseplayers say this moderate underdog is the smart bet, but that's exactly the kind of thing those rumpled, worn-out romantics like to spout; just go listen to Tom Waits for a while if you don't know what we mean

Denis Of Cork, 12/1: The racing circuit's worst-kept secret is that Denis Of Cork has been going easy in his last few races to hide the fact that he is actually a rebodied 1985 Camaro Z-28

Tale Of Ekati, 20/1: Great-grandsire was Mr. Prospector; need we say more?

Behindatthebar, 25/1: Raised by the fly-by-night Padua Stables, bred by Dr. Frank Justice and Meadow Oaks Farm LLC, who can't breed for shit, and trained by Todd Pletcher, the worst trainer of all time, Behindatthebar is a born loser and is bound to place, at best

Anak Nakal, 50/1: Facing an uphill climb as jockey Rafael Bejarano will be weighing in at a disgusting 110 pounds

Macho Again, 50/1: Quick, agile, and eager, but may not have recovered the sheer power he had when he raced under the moniker of "Macho In The First Place"

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