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Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.

Archaeologists Uncover Last Human To Die Happy

DEMBECHA, ETHIOPIA—In a startling find that contributes significantly to the understanding of modern man’s evolutionary development, University of Edinburgh archaeologists working in Ethiopia’s Afar Region announced Wednesday that they have uncovered the preserved remains of the last human to die happy.
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Highlights From SXSW Interactive

The interactive portion of the South by Southwest festival concluded yesterday in Austin, TX. Here is a look back at the top moments from this year’s event:

  • Enterprising attendees save time by pronouncing festival’s name as Six-Saw
  • Handshake that will someday lead to two Chapter 11 bankruptcies occurs
  • Everyone with real job stays home
  • 250,000th time someone mentions they could totally see themselves living in Austin for a few years at least
  • Happy hour where Pete from tech talked to some guy who works at Facebook
  • Everyone unknowingly networks with exact same people from last year’s festival
  • Organizers print up a few hundred more “Bryce” nametags
  • The festival once again honors veterans in its field when 22-year-old Android app developer Josh Nathe is given the SXSW Lifetime Achievement Award
  • Seventy tons of Fuze Beverage promotional iPhone cases trucked to Austin-area landfill
  • The game—the whole game, all of it—completely changed. The future is here. The future is now.
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