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Vol 48 Issue 17

Pilots

ABC 8:00 p.m. EST/7:00 p.m. CST Two airline captains concoct new TV show ideas as they fly

Report: A-Rod Probably Thinking About Betting On Baseball

NEW YORK—After carefully analyzing the progression of contemptible things the Yankees third baseman has done in his career, a report released Friday by the University of Missouri's sports psychology department concluded Alex Rodriguez is most likely...

Cash Cab

Discovery 6:30 p.m. EST/5:30 p.m. CST People who can afford to take cabs get a once-in-a-lifetime shot at hundreds of dollars.
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TV Listings
Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

Special Coverage

Fantasy Sports

Little League Pitcher Just Getting Fucking Shelled

RED BANK, NJ—After watching the 11-year-old give up the fourth straight double that inning, sources confirmed Sunday afternoon that local Little League pitcher Dustin Bauer is getting absolutely fucking shelled out there.

Small Business

Onion Video

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