The nation’s top researchers concluded that you can’t hide how stoned you are and that you should be freaking out if you aren’t already.
- 1886: Always needing to be first, Ty Cobb pushes aside the baby that was supposed to come of his mother's vagina
- 1919: Man o' War doesn't start running until 1:50 into the race
- 1920: Cleveland shortstop Ray Chapman leans over the plate as though he were begging to be beaned in the head and killed on the ball field
- 1997: Long thought of as an over-the-top disciplinarian, P.J. Carlesimo gets right in Latrell Sprewell's face and yells, "There is no way in the world that you would strangle me right now"
- 1997: Prior to Game 5 of the NBA Finals against the Utah Jazz, Michael Jordan injects the flu into his body
- 2003: With Game 7 of the ALCS tied in the 11th inning, Red Sox pitcher Tim Wakefield decides to finish off the unknown Aaron Boone with one of his signature floaters
- 2008: Rather than punting like he should, Lions coach Rod Marinelli repeatedly goes for it on first down
- 2009: Bill Simmons publishes 750-page book about basketball; the word "basketball" appears only 37 times in the text, whereas "Bill Simmons" appears 5,723 times