Internet Against SOPA, PIPA

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Vol 48 Issue 04

Just For Show

This newly renovated building is the perfect place for dates to drop you off, and a photograph of its exterior is a great way to prove to your parents that you’re doing fine on your own.

Screwballs

ABC Family 7 p.m. EST/6 p.m. CST The gang engages in all the hijinks allowed by ABC Family Worldwide's strict programming guidelines, including a three-second pillow fight and almost dropping a birthday cake.

The Art Of Compromise

Never imagined you'd be 35, married with two kids, and working a job you can't stand in a town you once vowed to leave?

Piers Morgan: The Animated Adventure

ABC 9 a.m. EST/8 a.m. CST This Saturday morning, Piers sets out on a quest to find the most-talented person in all of Morgania before sitting down for a chatty, yet in-depth interview with cartoon Rob Lowe.
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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Internet Against SOPA, PIPA

Last week, several websites, including Google and Wikipedia, raised awareness of the prohibitive measures included in the Stop Online Piracy Act (SOPA) and the Protect IP Act (PIPA). Here are some of the legislation's controversial provisions:

  • Music review sites can only allude to a song's title and content in vague terms
  • All pirated material available only at the Commerce Department's new site, Torrent.gov
  • Government will actively encourage people to download only public-domain music, such as Pipey Lester's "That Cat's a-Mewing!" or Ukulele Ted's "Nickel For Your Hat"
  • Denies future generations the ability to watch hilarious scene from Dirty Work where Chris Farley yells at the Asian hooker anytime, free of charge, which is a fundamental right of being an American
  • Does absolutely nothing to get rid of goddamn Lolcats
  • Makes the MPAA and RIAA feel better, which, if you have any shred of a soul, causes pure rage to swell through your very being
  • Any person suspected of Photoshopping bill sponsor Rep. Lamar Smith (R-TX) in an unflattering manner shall be subject to a minimum sentence of two months in prison; sentence will be increased by an additional two months if MS Paint is used
  • No longer legal to steal Ryan Gosling's credit card information
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