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Ringo Starr Announces 26th Beatles Album With New Backing Band

‘Moonbeam Sunday’ Slated For Release On June 16

LONDON—Excitedly informing fans that the iconic pop group was back with more original music, Ringo Starr announced Tuesday that on June 16 he would be releasing a 26th Beatles album titled ‘Moonbeam Sunday’ with an all-new backing band.
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Justin Bieber’s Rise And Fall

Teen pop idol Justin Bieber was arrested earlier this month for allegedly driving under the influence and drag racing in Florida, marking the latest incident in a string of troubling behavior that reportedly includes drug use, throwing eggs at his neighbor’s house, and spray-painting graffiti in Brazil. Here is a timeline of Justin Bieber’s path from YouTube sensation, to global superstar, to front-page delinquent:

  • June 2008: Bieber is first discovered singing soulful spirituals while tilling an Ottawa-area cotton field
  • July 2008: Before packing up and moving to Atlanta to meet with manager Scooter Braun, Bieber experiences his last normal interaction with other human beings
  • Feb. 2010: Bieber’s music video “Baby” becomes the most watched YouTube video of all time, topping the previous records set by “How To Set Up Your Epson XP-410 For A Wireless Network,” “Setting Up Your Epson XP-410 For Windows 8,” and “My Review Of The Epson XP-410”
  • Aug. 2010: Ominous tone begins to creep into Behind The Music narrator’s voice
  • Dec. 2010: The teen icon begins an on-again-off-again relationship with popular ’90s Latin recording artist Selena
  • Sept. 2012: Bieber starts lifting weights, and it shows
  • Feb. 2013: Something snaps
  • Nov. 2013: Bieber suffers a full emotional breakdown after coming across a crude drawing he made at age 5 depicting him and his parents standing in front of a house, smiling
  • Jan. 2014: World makes laughably naive judgment that Justin Bieber has hit rock bottom

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