Little League World Series Highlights

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Vol 45 Issue 35

Sanford Vows To Complete Term

South Carolina governor Mark Sanford, who disappeared for several days in June to visit his Argentine lover, has stated that he will not resign...
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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Man Considers Nodding Approvingly After Friend’s Drink Purchase

MEQUON, WI—Seeking to convey his endorsement of his acquaintance's selection at local bar Coney's Draft House this evening, area man Thomas Dodge told reporters that he was considering nodding approvingly at his friend’s alcoholic beverage pur...

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Little League World Series Highlights

  • After putting on a special batting helmet and protective vest as well as an ankle brace and two batting gloves, Scott Gordon strikes out on three straight pitches
  • For the first time since the 1983 LLWS, more players are called "tiger" than "scout"
  • The Japanese team is brought in front of a Little League tribunal after defying mercy rule conventions in a 417-2 romp of Saudi Arabia
  • Jake Hewitt's mom from the Peabody, MA team says she's going to get water for everyone but comes back with Gatorades and it's awesome
  • The Urbandale team sets a new LLWS record by crying for a straight 22 minutes after losing
  • Georgia player Kyle King slides headfirst so as to avoid breaking the crack vials in his back pocket
  • During a visit to the Little League Hall of Fame, tournament participants rush to the plaques of their heroes: Danny, Todd, and Kyle
  • ESPN momentarily stops the telecast after an onscreen graphic shows that Jason Ferrell's favorite sexual position is the reverse cowgirl
  • The Staten Island team representing the Mid-Atlantic sets an LLWS record with 85 "fuckin's" and 38 "faggots"
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