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Tips

Choosing The Right Dog For You

Once you decide to get a dog, there’s a wide range of adoptable pets to choose from, whether it’s a mutt or purebred. The Onion offers some helpful tips for choosing the dog that’s right for you.

Choosing The Right School For Your Child

With a new school year beginning soon, parents are making decisions about which type of school best fits their child’s needs. The Onion breaks down what each has to offer.

The Onion’s Beach Bag Essentials

Each summer, Americans flock to the coasts to enjoy the sun and waves. Here are the beach bag must-haves you should never head to the shore without.

Top Family Vacation Spots

With school out for the summer, families are packing up and hitting the road. Here are The Onion’s top family vacation destinations.
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Marathon Training Tips

Running a marathon is a major life goal for many people, but it takes precise planning and extensive training to succeed in the 26.2-mile-long race. Here are some training tips for marathon hopefuls:

  • Quit your job
  • Hire a personal trainer to make sure you’re training as expensively as possible
  • Make sure you have a pair of new, comfortable running clogs
  • Familiarize yourself with the course ahead of time so you’ll know how to direct ambulances to your location
  • Carbo-load with plenty of pasta the night before you consider entering a marathon
  • Try to run at least once before race day
  • Staying hydrated is important, so be sure to drink plenty of bodily fluids
  • Bear in mind that cramps are a signal you are about to die
  • Visualize your success and how good it will feel to accomplish something hundreds of other people will accomplish before you that day
  • Driving 26.2 miles is also an accomplishment of sorts
  • Be sure to check with your doctor whether you have any health problems that could give you any excuse whatsoever not to do this


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