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National Zoo Announces Giant Pandas To Divorce

WASHINGTON—Assuring the public that the decision was difficult but the right thing to do for all parties involved, the Smithsonian National Zoological Park announced Friday that their giant pandas would be divorcing.

New Climate Change Report Just List Of Years Each Country Becomes Uninhabitable

GENEVA—Stating that the data published within its pages represented the scientific consensus of top researchers around the world, the U.N. Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change released its annual report this week, which consists solely of an alphabetized list of every country on earth and the years each of them will become uninhabitable.

Pros And Cons Of Electric Cars

With technology improving and more automobile companies releasing electric models, electric cars are becoming a common alternative for American consumers. Here are the pros and cons of electric vehicles.
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Most Offensive Team Names

With the Washington Redskins coming under fire for having a disrespectful name, Onion Sports examines some of the most insulting monikers of sports teams.

  • Des Moines Schutzstaffel
  • San Antonio Late-Term Abortions
  • Boston Irish Fucks
  • Lexington Lynch Mob
  • Seattle Slave Traders
  • Phoenix Child Pornographers
  • Atlanta Jim Crows
  • Birmingham Whites Only
  • The Jerry Sandusky Football Camp All-Stars
  • San Diego Rectal Prolapse
  • Detroit Black Guys Bred To Be Superior Athletes
  • Jacksonville Jaguars
  • San Francisco Ching-Chongs

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