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Sports

Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

NFL Loses Rights To ‘Super Bowl’

NEW YORK—After failing to agree to terms for a new licensing agreement before the February 3 deadline, the NFL lost the rights to the term “Super Bowl” on Friday, sources confirmed.
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Most Overlooked Sports Stories Of 2008

Chase Utley is struck by a record-breaking seven consecutive pitches while sitting in the Phillies dugout

NBA Commissioner David Stern scores a respectable 12 points in the All-Star game

For the 11,472nd time, an NFL first quarter ends in a tie

Slow-ass NFL safety and cheap-shot artist John Lynch, who couldn't cover a receiver to save his life and was an obnoxious prick on top of it all, retires to little fanfare just like he fucking deserved, the miserable shit. Fuck John Lynch

During Bob Knight's on-court retirement celebration, the former Texas Tech and Indiana Hoosiers coach makes fans listen to Frank Sinatra's "My Way" for five straight hours

Wladimir Klitschko defeats WBO champion Sultan Ibragimov to unify the IBO, IBF, and WBO titles, which does absolutely nothing for the sport of boxing

A lot of cool shit had to have happened in the 2008 gliding championships

Lance Armstrong is forced to sit down with Jake Gyllenhaal and Matthew McConaughey and explain to them why they can't do the Tour de France with him

In his first at bat of the season, Rays rookie Evan Longoria hits a ground ball and accidentally runs to third base

The Detroit Red Wings win the 2008 Stanley Cup

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