adBlockCheck

Recent News

Pros And Cons Of The Gig Economy

Americans are increasingly using on-demand services, both as workers and consumers. Here are the major benefits and drawbacks of the gig economy.

Frontier Airlines Tells Customers To Just Fucking Deal With It

‘You’re Uncomfortable For A Few Hours And Then You Get To Be Somewhere Else,’ Says CEO

DENVER—Noting that some discomfort should be expected while traveling to a faraway place in just a few goddamn hours, officials from ultra-low-cost carrier Frontier Airlines reportedly told customers Thursday to just fucking deal with it.

Top Family Vacation Spots

With school out for the summer, families are packing up and hitting the road. Here are The Onion’s top family vacation destinations.
End Of Section
  • More News

New Dr Pepper Drink Aimed At Men

Dr Pepper Ten, a new diet soda from the Dr Pepper Snapple Group, is being marketed to men with the slogan "It's not for women." Here are some of the other ways the company is portraying the beverage's masculinity:

  • Pull-out supplement in Men's Health with instructions on how to use the bottle to massage the prostate
  • For first time, revealing Dr Pepper's first name, which happens to be Mark
  • Dr Pepper–sponsored legislation could punish women caught imbibing the beverage with stiff monetary penalties or up to two years in prison
  • Removing estrogen from Dr Pepper's original formulation of 23 flavors
  • 24-packs come equipped with heavy-duty twine for securing the case to the hood or roof of a man's automobile
  • Layer of body hair covering the majority of the can
  • Bow-hunting tip under the cap of every bottle
  • Promo in national restaurant chain offering free serving of Dr Pepper Ten every time you sexually harass a waitress
  • Maybe an ad featuring a picture of a guy holding a football

More from this section

Frontier Airlines Tells Customers To Just Fucking Deal With It

‘You’re Uncomfortable For A Few Hours And Then You Get To Be Somewhere Else,’ Says CEO

DENVER—Noting that some discomfort should be expected while traveling to a faraway place in just a few goddamn hours, officials from ultra-low-cost carrier Frontier Airlines reportedly told customers Thursday to just fucking deal with it.

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close