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What You Need To Know About Last Night’s Oscars Debacle

Many viewers were left wondering about the sequence of events that led to the initial erroneous declaration of ‘La La Land’ as the Best Picture winner at the Academy Awards Sunday instead of the real winner, ‘Moonlight’. The Onion breaks down what you need to know about this fiasco.

Brad Pitt Sidelined 6 To 8 Weeks With Red Carpet Toe

LOS ANGELES—Saying doctors strongly recommended that he stay off the injured foot, representatives for Brad Pitt confirmed to reporters Sunday that the actor was sidelined six to eight weeks with a case of red carpet toe.

The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:
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New 'X-Files' Movie Opens

Six years after it went off the air, The X-Files is back in a new feature-length film titled The X-Files: I Want To Believe. What is in store for audiences?

A lengthy subplot that explains in detail why Mulder and Scully's hairstyles have changed

Mulder is heavily criticized by his FBI superiors for using "circa 1995" tactics for investigating paranormal phenomena

Composer Mark Snow has transposed the franchise's haunting piano line from the key of A minor to the even creepier key of A-flat minor

Child who says "I made this!" during Ten Thirteen Productions bumper revealed to be an extraterrestrial

Story updated with single iPod reference

Mulder, Scully, and their new alien friend, Xeeblop, struggle against all odds to make it to the top of the go-karting circuit

In an attempt to diffuse the sexual tension, Mulder exposes himself constantly throughout the movie

Turns out government is not to blame for anything; it was just a big misunderstanding

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