NFL Combine 2008

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Little League Pitcher Just Getting Fucking Shelled

RED BANK, NJ—After watching the 11-year-old give up the fourth straight double that inning, sources confirmed Sunday afternoon that local Little League pitcher Dustin Bauer is getting absolutely fucking shelled out there.

NFL Combine 2008

Darren McFadden's 4.33 40 time is the talk of this year's pre-draft workout, but it was far from the only notable moment in Indianapolis last weekend:

Hawaii QB Colt Brennan completed 17 passes out of the 20 he attempted during the bench press segment

Michigan QB Chad Henne demonstrated his ability to sing three-part harmony by himself as scouts looked on in consternation and growing horror

DE Vernon Gholston put in the combine's strongest showing with a 4.6 40 time, five-second cone drill, 48-inch vertical, laser vision, the ability to fuel cars with his urine, and a broad jump from which he has not yet come down

QB prospect Joe Flacco is being called the next Tom Brady for his chiseled jaw, soulful eyes, tousled hair and roguish grin

Everyone except Michigan running back Mike Hart finished 40-yard dash this year

N.C. State defensive lineman Tank Tyler ate the entire pile of Wonderlic tests in under 12 minutes

Virginia offensive guard Branden Albert just stretched for three days, then left

OT Ryan Clady goes from underrated to top prospect to bust to underrated again in less than five minutes

After a one-handed catch, the coaches ranked Virginia Tech's Justin Harper the greatest player of all time

Louisville's Harry Douglas couldn't understand why every time he took a step, people began writing furiously in their notebooks

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