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NFL Midseason Report 2007

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Report: Gonzaga’s In Washington, Right?

NEW YORK—Ahead of the team’s first-round game against Seton Hall in the NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament, a new report released Thursday revealed that Gonzaga is in Washington state, right?

Teary-Eyed Robert Griffin III Slips On Draft Day Suit Again

WASHINGTON—With several tears streaming down his face as he stood alone in his bedroom’s walk-in closet, sources confirmed Wednesday that former Washington Redskins quarterback Robert Griffin III slipped on the suit he wore to the 2012 NFL Draft.
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NFL Midseason Report 2007

Upon reaching the midpoint of the 2007 NFL season, Onion Sports lists the notable moments, achievements, and situations in pro football thus far:

The defending Super Bowl champion Colts get out to an embarrassing 7-1 start, made worse by the fact that their quarterback isn't on pace to break the single season touchdown record

The Patriots' relentless scoring barrage has led to questions of whether they're the greatest team ever or just a bunch of cocky assholes

Thanks to a combination of tough play, fortunate turnovers, sudden outbreaks of ball lightning, and grand pianos falling from stadium upper decks, the abysmal Detroit Lions somehow win six games

Ben Roethlisberger is having a career year, due to the quarterback's new offseason training regimen of not almost killing himself

The New Orleans Saints continue to symbolize their home city, which has shown flashes of brilliance in an otherwise tragic and possibly never-ending rebuilding process

The Dolphins are just really, really bad

LaDainian Tomlinson decides to focus his energy on the first two yards beyond the line of scrimmage this season

A 43-year-old man defeats the Arizona Cardinals

In his first start, Derek Anderson surprises everyone with a reminder that there is, in fact, a football team in Cleveland

The first-ever regular season overseas game between the Giants and Dolphins in London works out much better than the less-advertised Jaguars-Buccaneers game in Swaziland

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