NFL Playoffs 2010

Top Headlines


Jumbotron Really Trying To Push New Third-Down Cheer On Fans

SAN DIEGO—Noting that the phrase had appeared in large blue letters during each of the team’s offensive drives, sources at Qualcomm Stadium confirmed Friday that the Jumbotron was trying really hard to push a new third-down cheer on San Diego Chargers fans.

Strongside/Weakside: Kris Bryant

By leading the Chicago Cubs in hits and home runs en route to their second straight playoff appearance, Kris Bryant has placed himself in the running for the National League MVP. Is he any good?

Rest Of Nation To Penn State: ‘Something Is Very Wrong With All Of You’

WASHINGTON—Stating they felt deeply unnerved by the community’s unwavering and impassioned defense of a football program and administration that enabled child sexual abuse over the course of several decades, the rest of the country informed Penn State University Friday that there is clearly something very wrong with all of them.

Strongside/Weakside: Lamar Jackson

After passing for eight touchdowns and rushing for another 10 in just the first three weeks of the season, Louisville Cardinals sophomore quarterback Lamar Jackson has quickly become the frontrunner to win the Heisman Trophy. Is he any good?

Strongside/Weakside: Carson Wentz

After being selected second overall in the 2016 NFL Draft, Philadelphia Eagles quarterback Carson Wentz opened the season with a nearly flawless performance in a victory over the Cleveland Browns. Is he any good?

Former WWE Wrestler Found Alive At 44

PHOENIX—In a revelation that has sent shockwaves through the wrestling world, sources confirmed that former WWE wrestler Freddy Hendricks, better known as his in-ring persona “Time Bomb,” was discovered alive Friday at the age of 44.

Strongside/Weakside: Dak Prescott

Having assumed the role after Tony Romo’s injury during the preseason, Dak Prescott is expected to open the NFL regular season as the first rookie quarterback to start for the Dallas Cowboys since 2004. Is he any good?

Study: 96% Of Pickup Games Decided By Next Score

PRINCETON, NJ—Noting that none of the game’s earlier events factored into the final outcome in any way whatsoever, a study released Wednesday by researchers at Princeton University revealed that 96 percent of all pickup games are decided by the next score.
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NFL Playoffs 2010

As the playoffs begin, Onion Sports offers an analysis of each team's chances to win it all.


  • Packers: Despite showing great resolve to make the playoffs, the Band-Aids and loose stitching holding the rest of the roster's appendages together can't last forever
  • Saints: Still the feel-good favorite, so given the way the world's been going lately, their plane will probably crash and kill them all pretty soon
  • Seahawks: Have the most potential, by definition
  • Eagles: The feel-good pick if you're a cat person
  • Bears: As a two seed, Chicago is granted the luxury of waiting an extra week to get embarrassed at home
  • Falcons: Have been a surprise all year, so prepare to be surprised again, depending on whether you expect them to win or lose


  • Jets: Yes, this team is in the playoffs
  • Ravens: Have everything you want in a playoff team, but not enough to keep you from just talking about The Wire for 90 percent of their game
  • Chiefs: A hardworking team that plays to its strengths, K.C. probably won't lose more than one game this postseason
  • Colts: Could come up with a few big wins if they're able to find a random man to put on a blue shirt and run toward the end zone
  • Steelers: Need to have more confidence in their running game, or at least lie and pretend they do
  • Patriots: …Sigh


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