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A-Rod Donates $25 Million To Be Displayed In Glass Case In Baseball Hall Of Fame

COOPERSTOWN, NY—Ensuring that a treasured piece of the game’s history will be forever preserved for future generations of fans, representatives of the National Baseball Hall of Fame confirmed Friday that retired third baseman Alex Rodriguez recently donated $25 million of his earnings to be displayed inside a glass case in their museum.

Milestones In X Games History

With the X Games kicking off in Minneapolis this Thursday, The Onion looks back at memorable moments in the event’s 22-year history:

ESPN Holds Daytime ESPYs

HARTFORD, CT—Recognizing the best in sports programming that occurs on weekdays from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., ESPN held the Daytime ESPY Awards at the Hartford XL Center Wednesday afternoon.

Man Hoping Game Gets Out Of Hand So He Can Do Something Else

DENVER—Settling into his apartment’s cramped living room to watch the midday game, local man Garrett Neubauer told reporters Wednesday that he hoped the televised baseball game between the Colorado Rockies and the San Francisco Giants would get out of hand soon so he could do something else.

OB-GYN Assures Serena Williams Fetus Developing Serve On Schedule

WEST PALM BEACH, FL—Observing that the unborn child was producing the smooth, fluid strokes expected in the third trimester, ob-gyn Dr. Theresa Umbers reportedly assured world No. 4–ranked tennis player Serena Williams at an appointment Tuesday that her fetus was developing its serve right on schedule.
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Notable Quarterback Controversies

Competition for starting jobs is heating up across the NFL, as is the potential for a quarterback controversy. Onion Sports takes a look at the greatest QB squabbles of all time:

  • 1973: Chuck Noll calls Terry Bradshaw and Joe Gilliam into his study to dramatically accuse Bradshaw of murder
  • 1989: Although Steve Young correctly guesses the number George Seifert is thinking of, Seifert still goes with Joe Montana
  • 1993: Redskins fans are up in arms as head coach Petitbon chooses the washed-up Mark Rypien over the Mark Rypien that won the Super Bowl
  • 1994: With his arch-nemesis holding Dave Brown and Kent Graham over a cliff, Giants coach Dan Reeves makes the most difficult decision of his life and lets them both go
  • 1997: Though Rich Gannon proves himself to be a strong leader, Marty Schottenheimer chooses Elvis Grbac because Rich Gannon doesn't have any arms
  • 2006: The Chargers award Philip Rivers the starting role when Drew Brees receives a lot more money to play somewhere else
  • 2007: After much deliberation and prayer, Tony Dungy once again goes with Peyton Manning at QB
  • 2009: Rules for the Derek Anderson–Brady Quinn quarterback competition don't stipulate that the loser will be executed on the 50-yard after the final preseason game

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