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Politics

Bo Obama Addresses Graduates Of Dayton Obedience School

DAYTON, OH—Calling on the 2017 class of canines to make the most of their training as they head out into the world, former first dog Bo Obama delivered a stirring commencement speech Friday to graduates of the Dayton Obedience School.

Rural Working-Class Archbishops Come Out In Droves To Welcome Trump To Vatican

VATICAN CITY—Arriving in their dusty pickup trucks from as far away as the dioceses of Oria and Locri-Gerace to express their support for a leader who they say embodies their interests and defends their way of life, droves of rural working-class archbishops reportedly poured into St. Peter’s Square today to greet U.S. president Donald Trump during his visit to the Vatican.

Trump: ‘I Am A Very Stupid Human Being’

WASHINGTON—Responding to a damning ‘Washington Post’ report alleging he had shared highly classified information with Russian officials, President Donald Trump addressed the concerns of the press, his fellow government officials, and the public at large Tuesday by announcing that he was an incredibly stupid human being.

Escalating Tensions Lead Trump To Shake Up Inner Circle Of TV Programs

WASHINGTON—Saying the decision arose out of the necessity to weed out certain key members whose values no longer aligned with the president’s, White House spokesman Sean Spicer told reporters Thursday that escalating tensions have led President Trump to shake up his inner circle of television programs.
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Obama's College Apartment On The Market

The New York apartment President Barack Obama inhabited while he was a student at Columbia University is available for rent at $1,900 a month. Here are some other pieces of Obama's past you can buy or rent:

  • Box of Playboy magazines filled with notes in the articles' margins—$125
  • Bar napkin on which he plotted out his entire presidency—$340
  • Garter belts from Rocky Horror Frank-N-Furter costume—$3,000
  • First mix tape ever made by Barack, featuring Kool and the Gang, James Taylor—$55,000
  • Hastily scribbled list of pros and cons of dating Michelle Obama—$300,000
  • Birthday card from Weather Underground—$125,000
  • First draft of his iconic 2008 campaign poster bearing the phrase "Positive Expectation" instead of "Hope"—$25,000
  • Complete set of Treasury bonds he created in 2009—$1.4 trillion

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