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Opposition To John Bolton

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Revelations From The DNC Email Leak

Last week, WikiLeaks posted 20,000 email exchanges among DNC officials, the content of which led to DNC chair Debbie Wasserman Schultz’s resignation on the eve of the convention. Here are some of the key revelations from the leak

CNN Producer On Hunt For Saddest-Looking Fuck With Convention Button Collection

PHILADELPHIA—Weaving his way through the crowd of patriotically dressed attendees excitedly milling around on the floor of the Democratic National Convention, CNN segment producer Jeff Raskin reportedly went on the hunt Monday for the most pitiful-looking fuck willing to speak on camera about their political button collection.

Trump Casually Informs Pence He Going To Make One Or Two Appearances During Speech

CLEVELAND—Pulling his running mate aside backstage at the Republican National Convention just minutes before the Indiana governor was scheduled to formally accept the party’s vice presidential nomination, GOP candidate Donald Trump casually informed Mike Pence that he would probably make one or two quick appearances during the Midwestern conservative’s headlining speech tonight.
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Opposition To John Bolton

John Bolton's temporary appointment as U.S. ambassador to the U.N. expires in January. This is what he's done to recently cause renewed opposition from both parties:

  • Replaced his seat at U.N. with comfy hammock
  • Constantly demands reform of other delegates' faces
  • Set up hundreds of committees and subcommittees in effort to cut U.N.'s bureaucratic fat
  • Can't keep pants on when meeting with leading senators
  • Repeatedly says, "Did you hear something? I thought I heard someone talking, but I don't see anyone" when other delegates address floor
  • Used aid allocated for Darfur to upgrade to premium U.N. meal plan
  • Continually lapses into mocking, stereotypical Italian accent
  • Has been generally as effective as rest of U.N.

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