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Player-Led Workouts

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Report: Gonzaga’s In Washington, Right?

NEW YORK—Ahead of the team’s first-round game against Seton Hall in the NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament, a new report released Thursday revealed that Gonzaga is in Washington state, right?

Teary-Eyed Robert Griffin III Slips On Draft Day Suit Again

WASHINGTON—With several tears streaming down his face as he stood alone in his bedroom’s walk-in closet, sources confirmed Wednesday that former Washington Redskins quarterback Robert Griffin III slipped on the suit he wore to the 2012 NFL Draft.
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Player-Led Workouts

In a normal year, most NFL teams would be starting their minicamps right now. With the lockout in effect, some players have taken the initiative to organize workouts on their own, with varying degrees of success.

  • Albert Haynesworth: 15 reps of breakfast
  • Buffalo Bills: Ryan Fitzpatrick organized a specialized passing practice at his house, during which teammates could come over and teach him how to properly throw the ball
  • Arizona Cardinals: Larry Fitzgerald invited several top players from different teams to work out at his Arizona compound, where he organized drills and begged them to sign with the Cardinals
  • San Fransisco 49ers: QB Alex Smith has been throwing to receivers Josh Morgan and Ted Ginn, though neither of them have caught any passes and both have repeatedly told him to get out of their homes
  • Tennessee Titans: TE Craig Stevens started working out at a nearby high school but was asked to leave about 20 minutes later
  • Chicago Bears: Defensive players practiced their team fundamentals by having linebacker Lance Briggs hit the tackling dummies while linebacker Brian Urlacher got all the credit
  • Kansas City Chiefs: Just holding regular offseason workouts as usual, because who pays any attention to the Chiefs?
  • Nobody: Working their asses off in negotiations so there can actually be some fucking football this year

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