adBlockCheck

Reasons For Obama’s Low Approval Rating

Top Headlines

Politics

The Arguments For And Against Bernie Sanders Staying In The Race

Bernie Sanders is ramping up his efforts in the presidential race despite long odds, while sharpening his criticisms of a Democratic Party increasingly focused on the general election with Hillary Clinton as their presumptive nominee. Here are the arguments for and against Sanders staying in the race

Donald Trump’s Campaign: Myth Vs. Fact

Donald Trump’s political positions, personal history, and potential governing style have been the subject of much debate throughout the 2016 election. The Onion separates myth from fact in this breakdown of Trump’s campaign:

Report: Well, Here We Go

WASHINGTON—With Donald Trump’s two remaining GOP rivals suspending their candidacies and clearing a path for the billionaire businessman to assume the Republican presidential nomination, reports indicated Wednesday that, well, hoo boy, here we go.

Ted Cruz Dressed For Campaign Rally By Swarm Of Loyal Vermin

INDIANAPOLIS—In what has reportedly become a daily routine on the campaign trail, Republican presidential candidate Ted Cruz stood alone in the center of his hotel suite Tuesday morning where he was carefully dressed and groomed by a swarm of loyal vermin.

How The GOP Plans To Stop Trump

In response to Donald Trump’s growing presidential primary lead, here’s how Republican Party leaders are ramping up efforts to prevent him from getting enough delegates to win the nomination outright.

It Unclear Why Thousands Of Loud, Chanting Trump Supporters Gathering Outside Arena In Iowa

‘There’s No Event Here, But They Keep Coming,’ Say Concerned Stadium Staff

DES MOINES, IA—Noting that the Republican presidential candidate had not announced any plans to visit Iowa since the state held its caucus 11 weeks ago, baffled sources reported Wednesday that it remains unclear why thousands of loud, cheering Donald Trump supporters are gathering outside the Wells Fargo Arena in Des Moines.

Obama Caught Trying To Jump White House Fence

WASHINGTON—The White House was briefly placed on lockdown Friday morning after “an addled and emotionally distraught” President Obama was reportedly caught trying to scale the North Lawn fence, the third such attempt this year, Secret Service officials confirmed.
End Of Section
  • More News
Up Next

Reasons For Obama’s Low Approval Rating

A new Quinnipiac University poll released Thursday showed that President Obama’s approval rating has plunged to 44 percent. Here are the reasons why Americans say they disapprove of Obama's job performance:

  • Hasn’t killed Osama bin Laden in over two years
  • Flawed handling of humanity’s inherent capacity for violence and deceit
  • Ranking someone else as poor engenders fleeting perception of superiority
  • Nightmarish oligarchy wherein millions of unemployed Americans watch as the wealthy grow endlessly richer somewhat of a bummer
  • Weak, effeminate hands
  • All that shit about his birth certificate and Obamacare
  • Has consistently wavered back and forth between doing nothing about climate change and doing nothing about gun control
  • Failed to preserve Americans’ blissful ignorance regarding privacy violations
  • Did not enact 9-9-9 taxation plan to fix economy and create jobs
  • Is unable to deliver consistently high approval ratings
  • Though the U.S. president admittedly has no influence over relevant crude oil production, a factor that is well beyond any one person’s direct control, fact remains that gas prices are fucking crazy right now
  • 2013

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close