Republican Reaction To Foley Scandal

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Vol 42 Issue 41

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After 33 years hosting punk shows, legendary club CBGB's closed its doors on Sunday. What do you think?
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Republican Reaction To Foley Scandal

With their party rocked by the Rep. Mark Foley sexual-harassment scandal, Republicans are using the following strategies to overcome the bad press:

  • Launching ad campaign entitled "Okay, We Goofed"
  • Releasing new, sexually explicit electronic messages that are more rooted in family values
  • Coming out against terrorism
  • Hiring new pages from pool of senior citizens desperate for work
  • Getting out and raising a little money together
  • Revealing how devastatingly handsome the teenage boy was
  • Only getting involved in scandals that don't directly fly in face of party line
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