adBlockCheck

Politics

Man In Center Of Political Spectrum Under Impression He Less Obnoxious

MT. VERNON, OH—Loudly explaining to anyone within earshot that both the left and right were ruining the level of discourse in this country, Jesse Levin, a man firmly in the center of the political spectrum, is under the impression that he is less obnoxious than those with more partisan viewpoints, sources reported Friday.

What Is Trump’s Relationship With White Nationalism?

Since the weekend’s violent protests in Charlottesville, VA, many have criticized President Trump for his failure to outright condemn the white supremacists involved. The Onion breaks down Trump’s relationship to this powerful hate group.

Ruth Bader Ginsburg Returns To Off-Season Lifeguarding Job

ALEXANDRIA, VA—Saying she hadn’t missed a summer since she was on the U.S. Court of Appeals, Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg said Tuesday that she had once again returned to her off-season lifeguarding job at Splash Central waterpark.

President’s American Manufacturing Council Down To CEO Of Shoe Carnival

WASHINGTON—Following a series of resignations from prominent CEOs amid the fallout from President Trump’s handling of white-nationalist violence in Charlottesville, VA, White House sources confirmed Tuesday that Trump’s American Manufacturing Council is now down to a single member, Clifton Sifford, CEO and president of Shoe Carnival.
End Of Section
  • More News

Romney's Campaign Gaffes

The Romney campaign scrambled to limit political fallout last week after the leaking of a video in which the GOP nominee made controversial comments about low-income Americans and those receiving government assistance. Here are some of Romney’s other campaign-trail gaffes:

  • June 2, 2011: Enters GOP race
  • Sept. 22, 2011: Overheard on a hot mic saying, “Sometimes I think things would be a lot easier if my name were Matt Romney”
  • Oct. 7, 2011: Accidentally introduces his family members by their annual incomes instead of their names
  • Nov. 21, 2011: Leans out over hotel balcony and dangles his third son, whose face is covered by a towel, for the crowd below to see
  • Feb. 12, 2012: Reams out butler in front of entire nation
  • Apr. 1, 2012: April Fools’ Day prank flops when nobody knows the difference between a croquet mallet and a polo mallet
  • Apr. 29, 2012: Accidentally has hive of wasps burst out of his chest while on Meet The Press
  • May 17, 2012: Stays for dessert at a private fundraiser and opens the floor to a few questions
  • Aug. 30, 2012: While delivering nomination acceptance speech, huge wad of $100 bills falls out of his pocket and thunks audibly on the podium

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close