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Politics

Robert Mueller Driving SUV 100 MPH Down Runway As Air Force One Narrowly Lifts Off

PRINCE GEORGE’S COUNTY, MD—Sending a pair of guards scrambling for safety as he gunned his black SUV through a chain-link gate and onto the tarmac, Robert Mueller, the former FBI director who was recently tapped to lead the ongoing investigation into the Trump campaign’s ties to Russia, chased Air Force One down the runway at Joint Base Andrews moments before takeoff, sources reported Tuesday.

Trump Asks Entire Senate To Clear Out Of Chamber So He Can Speak To Comey Alone

WASHINGTON—Entering through a side door and bidding the assembled legislators, congressional aides, and members of the media to give him a moment with the former FBI director, President Donald Trump reportedly asked the entire Senate to clear the chamber during James Comey’s testimony Thursday so he could speak to him alone.

A Timeline Of The Watergate Scandal

With the White House mired in controversy, comparisons to Washington’s most famous scandal have been common, if not always accurate. Forty-five years after the events leading to Nixon’s resignation, The Onion presents a detailed timeline of the Watergate scandal.
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Scooter Libby Trial

Scooter LIbby, former aide to Vice President Dick Cheney, is on trial for obstructing the investigation into the outing of CIA agent Valerie Plame. Here are some highlights of the trial:

Tim Russert impresses courtroom by polishing off a one-pound bag of beef jerky during his testimony

Jurors show up one day all wearing the same sweater

Struck by a fit of generosity, prosecutor Patrick Fitzgerald throws stacks of immunity agreements from courthouse roof

Disguised Dick Cheney sits in back of courtroom giving Libby the "throat slit" pantomime

New York Times writer David Sanger asks the attorney questioning him to spell his name for the article he's writing for tomorrow's paper

Everyone gets to say "Valerie Plame" as much as they want

Former White House spokesman Ari Fleischer breaks down on stand and cries like a little baby

Members of jury ask everyone to slow down and explain what the hell this thing is all about

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