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Seacrest vs. Cowell

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Nation's Hardass Cops Finally Find Time To Play Games

In a sudden departure from their long-held stance of not being here to play games and not, in fact, having the time to play games, the nation’s hardass cops announced Wednesday they had finally carved out a couple hours during which games could be p...

Hollywood Stars Overthrown In Bloody C-List Uprising

LOS ANGELES—Unleashing a brutal wave of violence and destruction that has upended the entire power structure of the entertainment industry overnight, the nation’s C-list celebrities have carried out a bloody coup to overthrow the hottest stars in Hollywood, sources reported Tuesday.

Lost Jack London Manuscript, ‘The Doggy,’ Found

RYE, NY—Workers inventorying the estate of a recently deceased Westchester County art dealer earlier this month reportedly stumbled upon a draft of a previously unknown Jack London novel titled The Doggy, and the work is already being hailed by many within the literary world as a masterpiece.
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Seacrest vs. Cowell

Tensions between American Idol stars Ryan Seacrest and Simon Cowell are coming to a head. Here is a timeline detailing their past friction:

1984: Cowell hangs up on a 10-year-old Seacrest following bitter dispute over whether Mocha Sugarcreek should have won Best Vocal Group on Star Search

2002: Producers tell Seacrest and Cowell that the show will be more entertaining if there is conflict between them

2003: In his book I Don't Mean To Be Rude, But…, Cowell refers to Seacrest throughout as "Bryan"

2004: Cowell quietly repeats everything Seacrest says for entire broadcast

2005: During a production meeting, Seacrest eats a cranberry Danish that Cowell had his eye on

2006: Names on the stars' dressing rooms are mysteriously changed to "Bowell" and "Peecrest"

2007: Paula Abdul says some inane bullshit about singing, and Seacrest goes to commercial before Cowell can respond with some equally inane bullshit

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