adBlockCheck

Entertainment

Your Horoscopes — Week Of January 24, 2017

Aquarius No offense, but when got into this business, dealing with empty and meaningless futures like yours sure as hell wasn’t what it had in mind. Pisces Though you’ve been told that dressing up once in a while wouldn’t kill you, the coroner’s report this week will contain evidence to the contrary.

How Movies Receive Their Ratings

Many Americans use the MPAA’s formalized rating system as a guide for which films to see. The Onion provides a step-by-step view into how these ratings are chosen:

‘Winnie-The-Pooh’ Turns 90

Winnie-The-Pooh, the A.A. Milne series featuring a stuffed bear and his toy animal friends, debuted 90 years ago this week. Here are some milestones from the franchise’s nearly century-long run:
End Of Section
  • More News

Season Finale Wrap-Up

The 2006–2007 TV season is over. In the event you couldn't watch them, here are some highlights from the season finales of your favorite shows.

Studio 60 On The Sunset Strip: Saddled with poor, trite, unrealistic writing, Danny and Matt face the cancellation of their show.

The Office: The Dunder-Mifflin employees show glimmers of expectation as they head off to act in some of the worst movies of the summer.

House: Dr. House goes missing, prompting the rest of the hospital staff to scream his name for the entire show.

Ugly Betty: Surprise!  America Ferrera is actually beautiful. As if a network would ever put a truly ugly—or even vaguely plain—person on television.

My Name Is Earl: The series comes to an abrupt end when Earl accidentally leaves his list in his jeans pocket and runs it through the wash.

Lost: Sawyer stuns the castaways by confessing that, many years ago, he killed a woman named Laura Palmer.

The King of Queens: The series ends on a down-note when the cast comes out for a final bow and no one claps.

WATCH VIDEO FROM THE ONION

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close