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A Timeline Of The EPA

A recently introduced House bill that would dissolve the Environmental Protection Agency questions the value of what this agency does and what its goals are. The Onion provides a timeline of the EPA’s 47-year history:

Man Either Sick Or Just At End Of Workday

CINCINNATI—Overwhelmed by a wave of fatigue, local man Will Markowski told reporters Tuesday that he was uncertain whether he was getting sick or if it was just the end of a normal workday.

A Timeline Of Abraham Lincoln’s Life

Every February, people across the the nation celebrate the legacy of Abraham Lincoln, widely considered to be one of America’s finest presidents. The Onion provides a timeline of the key moments in President Lincoln’s life:
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Soaring Oil Prices Alter Vacation Plans

With gas solidly over $4 a gallon for the first time and air travel becoming prohibitively expensive, many families are being forced to change their summer travel plans. What are people doing instead this summer?

Maybe trying that Mexican-looking place over on Butterfield Road

Siphoning gas from every car in the zoo's parking lot

Breaking the news to kids that they're not going to Disney World after all, making up for it with the purchase of a crazy lawn sprinkler

Rediscovering the attic

Foregoing tour of Ireland in favor of an afternoon at O'Shaughnessy's

Packing the station wagon, piling into the station wagon, sitting in the station wagon, getting out of the station wagon

Family bath

Staring uncomfortably at one another closer to home

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